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The Gottman Method

Updated: Apr 22, 2021


Marriage is a beautiful union between two people. Two people who have decided to partake in a commitment to go through life with one another. However, as any married person knows, marriage is not without its ups and downs. It is inevitable for couples to go through challenges and disagreements. Does this sound familiar? Nevertheless, it is essential to not dwell on the problems and seek a solution to the problem. One solution is partaking in couples therapy, it allows the individuals to not only confront the root of the problem but allow them to move past it and reconnect with one another.


One frequent question that should be asked, is there anything that was left unexpressed or misunderstood? Often, little conflicts that were produced due to a miscommunication or a misinterpretation of what was said can turn something small and irrelevant into a hostile exchange. A conducive method used in couples therapy is known as the “Gottman Method”.


This method for couples counseling is unique because it is not only research based, but it is also personalized to each couple in their needs. The main theory is known as, “The Sound Relationship House Theory”, which consists of 9 different components.


According to the Gottman Method Institute, the 9 components consist of:


· Build Love Maps

· Share Fondness and Admiration

· Turn Towards instead of Away

· The Positive Perspective

· Manage Conflicts

· Make Life Dreams Come True

· Create Shared Meaning

· Trust

· Commitment


How would you consider your marriage? Even if, you have a healthy marriage, it does not hurt to try these methods together with your spouse. There is always a possibility for growth within your marriage.


The intention of the Gottman Method is for couples to not only be able to overcome their conflicts but to find a healthier resolution as well as strengthen their overall connection. This is great for couple’s therapy because, it allows the couple to learn new ways to confront a problem when it arises and work together to find a solution on their own in a healthier way.




*****Disclaimer: This post is for educational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice.

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